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Take lots of digital photos during the camp, making sure that each child features in many of them. These photos will be used for prewriting activities and in the final published writing sample. Take small group photos as well as individual close-ups. Students should each be able to find one photo to use in their published writing. Print out and display selected camp photos. Blutack photos to a whiteboard or painted or laminated surface so that they can be easily accessed for later activities.
Set aside a prominent place in the classroom to build up a progressive display. Set up a display area of activity charts, word lists and writing models to use as the unit progresses, eg. What did we say about time words yesterday? What other verbs could you use to describe that movement? What did we say personal voice was? How has this writer started their writing? Let's refresh our memory about the assessment criteria.
If your display area is near to the blackboard ledge this could be used to display close at hand, the original copies of the writing models used in the close reading sessions, eg. from The Journals' of Young Peoples' Writing. Mark other appropriate examples of personal recounts that you find in School Journals, Ready to Read texts, and commercial reading texts with sticky notes for students to pick up and read as well, eg. at SSR times. Expose the students to lots of personal recount models during the unit, not just those that you use for close reading.
Ideally this should be near to the teaching station and in clear view of the students, for reference to and reflecting on during teaching sessions and independent student writing times.
Together brainstorm and list all the 'fun and memorable' activities at camp, eg. kayaking, abseiling, river swimming, night walking... The teacher records these on pre-cut rectangles of coloured paper as the students suggest them. Blutack them onto the teaching whiteboard as you go. In a sharing circle let each child name their favourite activity and in one sentence tell why.
Cut up the coloured paper you wrote the camp activities on into three or four pieces each, (depending on group sizes). Group the class into small groups by giving out one piece to each student. Students match up their activity to find their group, then collect an A3 piece of paper and glue stick the activity pieces to the middle of the paper making up their word.
Each group now brainstorms and records their feelings associated with the activity all around it using the feelings_chart (RTF 147KB) . What did you feel before, during and after you did this activity?This should generate some strong personal responses. Share charts and note similar, unusual or different feelings. Make a class chart 'Camp Feelings' listing each feeling recorded. Display the chart for future reference.
Role-play, acting out some of the feelings listed on the charts, eg. scared. Let several students perform a challenging camp activity in role, eg. abseiling. Talk about what to look for, eg. When someone is scared how do they stand? How do their eyes look? How do they breathe?
"His eyes grew larger and larger and he clenched his fists until the knuckles turned a yellowy-white. Suddenly he sucked in gulps of air..."
Record some on the whiteboard, modelling writing in detail. Write some of these up later and display as models of detailed writing to describe feelings and actions.
Encourage the students to describe the feeling by describing the facial expressions and non-verbal language, without actually naming the feeling.
Relate this to writing, and talk about how a writer can give clues and leave the reader to work it out for himself or herself. We don't need to make everything obvious in writing - it helps to build pictures in the reader's head, as well as atmosphere and mood and suspense, allowing the reader to interpret the writing themselves. Encourage the Show, Don't Tell writer's craft.
Model this activity on one of the charts before you begin. Choose six or seven camp activities from those named in the 'Camp Chat'. Write one at the top of each bus_stop_chart (RTF 11KB) in the blank row. Place these around the classroom. Group the students using a different grouping strategy:
A Variety of Ways to Group Children for Activity Work
These are fun ways of grouping children, (or asking them to contribute to a class discussion), focusing on the topic of study at the same time as re-energizing them with some physical movement around the room. They can be used at anytime, but are a good way to introduce a new activity or to break up long periods of work with some movement.
Also see more ideas on P. 99 Top Tools for Social Science Teachers.
Each group adds different types of words to the list as they go.
Examples of words to add to the bus stop charts:
Return to the class group and ask each group to share their charts. Draw attention to any quality descriptions. Ask questions that encourage attention to detail, eg. What feeling do you think these words might be telling us? How was this person feeling? How do we know? Did they name the feeling? What words did they use? Can the way a person moves tell us how they are feeling? How would you be moving if you were feeling like this? What would your facial expressions be if you felt like this?
In this activity students will explore the concept of inner monologue. Use the digital photos already on display. Each student selects one photo that they feature in. Model how to write inner monologue in the thinking bubble.
Student then write their thoughts, 'the talking they did in their head', in a thought_bubble (RTF 119KB) . The thought bubbles can be photocopied, or created on a computer by inserting a digital photo into publishing software.
Display these beside the photos in the class display area, so that they will be available for reference later when writing personal recounts.
Before:Let the students know in advance that they will be telling an anecdote about an interesting and memorable camp experience to a small group of other students and will later be writing about one memorable experience. They need time to think about one that they would like to work on in some depth in both speaking and writing.
Discuss - What is an anecdote? Why do people tell anecdotes? (To entertain or inform...) Who do they tell them to? (Identify audience) How do they tell them? (Language style, register) Is it formal or informal? What would be a good camp anecdote to tell? Why? How could the speaker make it interesting for those listening? (Verbal and non-verbal techniques: tone, volume, pace, facial expressions, gestures, pauses)
The modelling (RTF 8KB) the oral retelling of an anecdote to the class using a variety of techniques.
Display the peer_assessment_oral (RTF 39KB) form enlarged to an A3 chart size. Discuss the assessment criteria. Talk about group assessment: cooperation and collaboration, reaching a consensus, sensitivity to other's feelings, no put-downs, how to give positive advice, how to accept positive advice...
Assess the teacher's modelled oral anecdote together with the class, filling in the form as you go. This will communicate guidelines on how it is done and give expectations for when the students do this in small groups independently.
During:Group the students into small groups of three or four. Sit in a sharing circle to facilitate active listening by the audience.
Each student in the group tells an anecdote about a personally significant and/or challenging camp experience to their small group. One student tells an anecdote, while the other group members listen. Do not use the assessment form at this point; focus on the speaking and listening interaction. Sit back and enjoy it!
Possible drama variations:
After:Assess each student, one at a time, directly after his or her retelling, using the peer assessment form. The whole group, (including the speaker being assessed), discusses the assessment criteria together and fills out the assessment form. All members then sign the assessment form.
Rotate:The next student now tells their anecdote, continuing in this way until all members of the group have had their turn.
Building vocabulary in preparation for writing. Select one camp experience to make a using the five senses: what did you see? hear? smell? feel? taste? during your chosen activity. Model how to make a word_bank (RTF 10KB) with the class before the students make their own in small groups.
Using a thesaurus and 'thinking aloud', model how you take care to choose just the right words to describe exactly what you saw, heard, felt, smelt and tasted in detail - eg. don't say the air stunk when the air smelt of musty clothes and mouldy fruit. Model how to be specific in your choice of nouns and verbs - eg. don't say the bird flew when it darted, circled or swooped.
Students get into small groups of two or three who have chosen the same camp activities, and record on their own word banks, sharing ideas, "hitchhiking" off each other, extending and learning from each other.
Record the name of the activity and draw a small picture in the blank square on their word bank. The word bank does not have to be completely filled in, it can be added to as you read and talk about model recounts or conference writing during the unit.
Students glue stick these word banks into their writing books ready for draft writing. Display modelled word bank in the display area with the photos, and Feelings and Bus Stop Charts already completed. These will then provide scaffolding for students during the process of writing their own personal recounts.
Teachers need to provide students with "scaffolding". This means temporary support: teaching students in such a way that what they can do with help today, they can do by them selves tomorrow. Focusing on the reading skills each student already has, with a clear understanding of what the student needs to learn next, the teacher can give the student just the right amount of modelling, support, and guidance.
Material from The Learner as a Reader is reproduced by permission of the publishers Learning Media Limited on behalf of Ministry of Education, P O Box 3293, Wellington, New Zealand, © Crown, 1996.
Choose a writing_models (RTF 6KB) to share with the class. eg. camp contexts:
School Journals: o The Confidence Course by Nellie Islon o Courage by Vanessa Effendi o Rock Climbing by Sarah Dyck o Water Slide o Snowboarding by Hayden Finlayson o River Bugs by Jan Trafford o The Big Jump by Philip Walker (see Resources) National Exemplar Project o The Diving Board
Select the language and text features that will be the focus for this model from the list of suggestions below, or others you may have already identified from your teaching programme and children's needs, eg:
The Confidence Course by Nellie Ison Journal of Young Peoples' Writing 1995 The Secret Lake Possible language features for this personal recount text: * Personal voice * Sentence structure - short simple sentences to create tension/atmosphere, eg. 'I was stiff.' 'I froze.' * First Person using the personal pronoun - I * Repetitive use of I * Inner monologue, eg.' "Mum!" I was calling in my mind. ' * Past tense, eg. 'I was stiff', 'grabbed',' ran' * Showing feelings with detail, eg. 'Tears trickled down my cheeks.' * Repetition, eg. 'One foot in front of the other, one foot at a time.' * Hyphens, eg. 'ankle-deep', 'three-wire', 'right-hand' * Ellipsis, eg.' I did the same with the other hand...then put both feet' * Dash, eg. 'I let go and felt so good - I knew I could do it again.'
If copyright allows photocopy a copy of the writing model for each student.
Students need to become familiar with different text forms and recognise that these have different structures. They need to become familiar with:
Non Fiction texts - Reading for Information
Expose students to:
Through reading, talking, exploring, and experimenting students can present their findings in a variety of visual texts such as maps, time lines, flow charts, venn diagrams, as well as a range of written texts such as explanations, instructions, reports, recounts, arguments,
Teachers will be able to integrate literacy learning with learning in other areas of the curriculum.
Develop confidence and competence in students, encourage and give support, model, guide, share, reflect, to develop INDEPENDENCE.
Teachers should plan a balance of the following approaches throughout the unit. Shared Reading - Guided Reading - Independent Reading - of selected, fiction or non-fiction texts, to demonstrate the ways structure assists the reader to gain information, using and discussing features such as title, table of contents, headings and subheadings, pictures and their captions, diagrams, index and glossary.
Skills to develop through close reading of transactional texts: questioning, summarising, analysing, making inferences, reflecting, imagining, hypothesising, sequencing, classifying, clarifying, predicting, interpreting.
Encourage students to find and list verbs, effective adjectives, explicit nouns, adverbs, similes and metaphors that help achieve meaning/feeling. Talk about sentence structure, punctuation.
Throughout the reading and writing programme there should be teacher modelling and student activities to develop the skills and strategies in the use of dictionaries, thesauri, and atlases.
Each day focus on one particular feature for the writing session. Do not try to focus on too many features at once. It is best to have one main focus for the day or writing session that you keep returning to in the discussion, and just noting other features spontaneously in passing. Choose from a variety of possible language and text features. Select these on class and individual student needs, their next learning steps. Possible topics will present themselves as you rove the classroom during writing time, conference and talk with the writers, listen to sharing times, analyse writing models to use with the students, and take time to read and reflect on their writing books at the end of the day.
Examples of possible language and text features for focus in personal recount writing:
Powerful VerbsIdentify powerful verbs in writing models. Discuss how these describe actions specifically, give more detail and create a picture in the reader's mind that reflects the writer's ideas more accurately. They also make writing more interesting and help build atmosphere and mood. Make class lists of powerful, descriptive verbs and display them, eg. words for slow movements/fast movements, words to show how you can speak, climb, swim. Select actions that relate to the writing contexts of the time. Model how the thesaurus is a useful tool for finding 'just the right' verb.
Linking Time WordsIdentify linking time words in recount models. Discuss where they are usually found, eg. beginning of sentences, and what their purpose is, eg. to show the passing of time usually in chronological order and to link the ideas and events together coherently. Make and display lists of for future reference.
Personal VoiceIdentify sections of language (words/phrases/sentences), in writing models that show personal voice. Discuss how these show the writer's 'own voice', their thoughts and feelings. What do you notice about these that are similar? What type of language is used when we hear the writer's personal voice? How does it make you feel as a reader? the audience? Discuss how sometimes it is easy to lose your personal voice when you try too hard to find new, different and more interesting words to use in your writing. Don't let too many changes when you edit take away your personal voice.
Sentence StructuresIdentify models of short and long sentences. Discuss where they are used and what effect they create, eg. short sentences create an atmosphere of action, speed and tension. Longer sentences flow more gently and create an atmosphere of gentleness, relaxation, and boredom.
Use the language of sentences as they become more familiar with them, ie. simple sentences, compound sentences, complex sentences, used in the National Exemplar Project Indicators.
Choose a different sentence structure for your focus each day, eg. today we are going to see if we can write a compound sentence in our writing. Can you find one in the model? How do you know it is a compound sentence? Why has the writer used it here?
Figurative LanguageChoose an example of figurative language that is used well in your writing model, eg. alliteration, onomatopoeia, personification, metaphor, simile. Identify the examples of it and discuss them. Why has the writer used them here? How did it help you as a reader to get meaning from the text? Can you think of any others we could use? eg. make a list of similes that could be used to describe the cold night air as you ventured out on the torch walk.
Personal PronounsDiscuss the word class: personal pronouns. What are they? Where are they used? Why are they used? The 'Peter passage' in Exploring Language is a good example to use to demonstrate the need for pronouns! Have some fun writing some passages without pronouns, using only proper nouns, like this passage. Read them aloud! Write some as a shared activity or in pairs and then swap them with another pair to edit. Make a list of personal pronouns. What do we mean by the first person? second person? third person? Role model this with a small group, changing from first to second/third person depending on who is telling the (same) story in the group. Look for personal pronouns in the writing model being used.
Inner monologueWhat is inner monologue? Revisit the thought bubbles made and on display. Talk about how you could include these in recount writing. Identify some examples in the writing model. How is inner monologue presented? Eg. italics, after an ellipsis, in short sentences, in parenthesis. How does inner monologue show the writer's own voice? Where could you use inner monologue? What might you say/write? Will it depend whom the audience is?
Detailed DescriptionsFind a part where the writer had added detail. Discuss how they have done this. What language features did they use? eg. adjectives, adverbs, powerful verbs, figurative language. Look for specific nouns, eg. totara instead of tree, and specific verbs, eg. scramble instead of climb. This is a way to add detail without adding in extra words. Look for descriptive colour words, eg. corn-yellow moon. Find a part where some more detail could be added, a part where you were left wondering as a reader. What questions did you want to ask the writer? Have the 5W's and H questions on cards, and on display or readily available. Use them often to encourage writers to add more detail. What? Why? How? When? Where? Which? If detail is your focus for the day/week, then blutack these cards along the top of your teaching station. Refer to them often in "writing talk".
Recount StructureDiscuss and model a for the structure and layout of a recount. From close reading of recounts identify the text features common to many recounts. eg.
PURPOSEIs the writer's intention to tell the reader what happened?
TEXT FEATURES Does the writing begin with an orientation, (who, when, where)? Are the events sequenced in chronological order?Are there personal comments on the events (the kite flying day was fantastic)?
LANGUAGE FEATURES Are the participants referred to specifically, (Mary, the teacher, the boys)? Is it written in the simple past tense? Are linking items to do with time used to give coherence (after lunch, at the same time, as soon as she left)?Is irrelevant information omitted?
PERSONAL RECOUNTS These usually retell an event that the writer was personally involved in. Does the writer use personal pronouns, (I, we)? Are personal responses included? Are details chosen to add interest?
FACTUAL RECOUNT These usually record particulars about a specific event. Does the writer use third person pronouns (he, she, it, and they)?Are details selected to help the readers reconstruct the activity accurately?
If this is new to students, give them a photocopied model of a written recount; making sure the model is a personal and not a factual recount. Highlight and label the parts that make up a recount, eg. first highlight the introductory paragraph one colour and label it introduction or orientation. Identify the features of the introduction. NB. personal recounts do not always adhere as closely to set text structures as factual recounts, but these give students good guides from which to springboard as their writing knowledge and skills grow. Do not let these planning structures inhibit students who already have a grasp of text structure from being creative writers.
OpeningsIdentify the opening sentence. How does this writing begin? eg. with some action, a description of the scene, someone's feelings, a flashback... What effect does this have on you as a reader? Does it grab your attention? Make you what to read more? Leave you in suspense? Give you background information?
EndingsFocus on the ending sentence(s), or paragraph. Does the writing feel finished? Did it leave you still wondering? Did you feel that it had come to a satisfactory ending? Why? Which words made you feel this? How do other writers bring their work to an ending? Have you a suggestion for this writer?
Comparing speaking and writingRecord one student as they tell their anecdote. Transcribe some of this literally word for word, including utterances. Read it back in a monotone and discuss: What do you notice? What is missing? (the changes in tone, stress, volume, facial expressions, non-verbal language, are not shown)
Discuss: What happens when you write down an oral anecdote? When we write do we write exactly as we speak? Why not? What is the difference between spoken and written language? How can we show the tone of the voice? pauses? loudness? facial expressions? non-verbal language? (with graphic cues, eg. punctuation, bold print, italics, capital letters, fonts, paragraphing...) What did these features do for the audience when they listened? Why is it important to show these features in writing too? Model some examples using graphic cues. Find some examples of graphic cues in the writing model and talk about them, eg. why has the writer used these dots here? What do we call these? Where could you use them?
Allow and plan enough time for students to be able to produce quality work. This means times to talk, collaborate, reflect, share, as well as time for shared, guided and independent writing and times for conversing and times for quiet uninterrupted writing.
A piece of quality writing is rarely produced in one session and within strict time limits. Use your professional judgement when setting time allowances, if the children are younger or are new to this genre, take time to get control of the structure of the genre, and its language features. Time taken now is well spent building a solid foundation for future writing, and allows students to achieve success and get satisfaction from their writing.
Aim to have all students complete a minimum of one personal recount, from planning to publishing
Follow this sequence, making use of one or several throughout the process:
Students select one significant camp activity to write about. For many it will be the activity they have told an anecdote on and made a wordbank about, but do not restrict them to this, they may have changed their mind as their knowledge and ideas have developed.
Individually brainstorm ideas for their writing, listing as many ideas and vocabulary as they can in a free flow mind map in their draft writing books.
Share their ideas with a partner, and then give an opportunity to make additions or alterations to their brainstorm.
As they complete their opening or that day's task, let them conference with each other. One way to do this without interrupting those still writing is to allow them to quietly come to the mat or some designated area where they partner up with someone else who has finished. Expect them to comment on and question each other's writing, modelling himself or herself on the teacher's example. They may conference with more than one partner in this time. Allow students to return to their desks to make alterations and additions to their writing after teacher or peer conferences. At the same time roam as a teacher, conferencing with individual students at the writing stage or small groups gathering on the mat. When most students have completed that day's task (eg. writing the opening) gather together for a sharing time, calling on some children to share their day's writing and ask for comments, eg. I like the part when ... because ... I didn't really understand where you were when... This is a good time to model conferencing questions.
When most students are well on the way with writing their personal recounts, spend a writing session reworking their recounts with the teacher as a class. Follow this Guided Self-Assessment procedure:
Editing can involve:
This means that you'll need to write on your draft, cross out bits, add bits, move bits. Don't worry if your draft looks messy. Your teacher needs to see the changes you have decided to make. If you need to, write a second draft before writing the final draft. If you are working on computer, you should still include your early draft with your editing changes marked on it, even though you can make the changes on the computer.
The final stage of the writing process is proof reading. Before completing your writing for assessment, it will need to be proof-read. This will ensure that your writing is accurate and free of small careless errors such as letters, words or punctuation accidentally left out. Use the proofreading (RTF 33KB) to help you check that your final draft is free from errors.
These processes will need to be modelled many times by the teacher. Praise students who are editing as they write, eg. crossing out and changing words or phrases, stopping to reread it at times, and students who are self-monitoring spelling as they write by underlining those they are not sure of for later checking. Neatness is not a priority at this stage; a well reworked text is the sign of a budding writer!
At the completion of the drafting of their personal recount do the peer_assessment_editing (RTF 96KB) . This is the final self-check when the student has finished draft writing their recount. Partner students (with teacher guidance), as they finish their draft writing. Share their recounts, first reading them aloud to each other, to entertain and inform. Next they focus closely on one of the written recounts at a time, together completing the peer assessment form, checking for editing and proofreading. This will guide focused peer discussion about their writing and highlight any areas that still need editing or correcting before publication of their work on the computer. A final check will need to be made by the teacher before publishing begins.
Teacher Anne Girven
YEAR
LEVEL
DURATION
Achievement Objective Being Assessed
Learning Outcomes
Processes
Select and adapt these learning activities to best meet the needs of your students, and to fit the time available:
Set up a learning (RTF 9KB) with a wide range of narrative texts. Provide books by authors that children enjoy and introduce new authors. Ensure that you cater for the needs of all students in your class. Provide a activities (RTF 107KB) that students can choose to work on.
Learning task 1
Learning task 2
Learning task 3
Learning task 4
Students to select one narrative to read and complete one of the following activities:
The teacher assesses the students' personal assignments in terms of their understanding of how language features contribute to the effects of narrative texts.
Teacher observes and assesses the students' ability to recall the story-line and their awareness of the language features of the genre.
self_assessment (RTF 36KB) assessment (RTF 17KB)
Resources from librariesStudent's own books
Brith the Terrible - 1982 P2 N1 Carlos Comes to Stay - 1988 P2 N1 Chimney Sweep - 1992 P1 N3 Dodgeball - 1985 P3 N3 Free as a Bird - 1989 P4 N2 Locked Room - 1983 P1 N2 Night Rescue - 1983 P3 N1 Rescuing Mum - 1989 P1 N1 Alien - 1995 P2 N2 Bow Down Shadrach - 1993 P3 N1 Ghost - 1993 P2 N4 Girl who Washed in Moonlight - 1984 P3 N1 The Snapper - 1982 P3 N1
Other journal resources can be found in the School Journal Catalogue under the following headings: challenge dilemma predicamentauthor's names
Assessment Resource Banks
Speech Bubbles 2 (ARB username and password required to view this resource)
Taniwha (ARB username and password required to view this resource)
Share and read booklets produced by students in the class.
Model proofreading (RTF 37KB) your work. Discuss that proof reading requires the author to look at
Give each student a proof reading checklist. Ask them to use the checklist to check their work.
Read What Makes A Shadow by Clyde Robert Bulla ( National Library) and discuss the shadows that were made in the story.
Read to the students Shadow Bear by Frank Asch, ( National Library). A delightful story of a little bear who attempts to escape a shadow that seems to be chasing him.
Following the reading discuss:
Reread Shadow Bear. Identify those aspects of the story that are purely fictional and those that "could happen" paying particular attention to how shadows change during the day.
Add to KWL chart - have we found answers to our questions? What else have we found out about shadows? Do we have more questions?
Shared Reading - read a selection of appropriate texts and/or Junior Journals exploring the language and text features of explanations. Explain to the students that they will be writing an explanation about shadows.
Use models of explanation writing from exemplars to read and discuss with students (see Why do Shadows Happen?, The Best Nest and How a Spider's Web Forms).
Read the explanation with the students. Talk about the explanation: How do we know this is an explanation? What impact does the explanation have on us as the readers? How would the author have gathered this information? List student responses on a chart.
Continue to read closely a selection of explanations. Discuss explanations extensively before asking the students to write an explanation. Encourage students to include a reason and use words like "because" or "then" to join their ideas when talking about an explanation.
Discuss with the students:
Teacher models how to brainstorm and then how to organise ideas into sequential order, thinking carefully how to start and end the explanation. Model how to select the best and most relevant ideas. Ask students for ideas, encouraging them to participate in the modelling process. Talk about the audience for their writing. Who will read it?
Teacher models writing an explanation: How is a shadow made?
Model how to complete the checklist (RTF 14KB) . Encourage students to identify the checklist points using the teacher modelled writing.
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